CAN U WORSHIP JESUS BY YOURSELF IN YOUR ROOM???

RECENTLY I HAD AN EXPERIENCE OF MY LIFETIME. I WAS DOWN AND DEPRESSED FOR I DONT KNOW WHAT AND DIDNT FEEL LIKE DOING ANYTHING THAT WAS WORTH WHILE AND JUST SAT FOR LIKE AN HOUR DOING NOTHING. IT WAS A WASTEFUL HOUR BUT IN THAT HOUR WHICH WAS FILLED WITH PAIN FOR I FELT THE HORROR OF MY MEMORIES FROM THE PAST AND IN THAT PAIN AND IN THAT SUFFERING I HEARD A SMALL VOICE THE VOICE OF TRUTH SAYING TURN ON SOME WORSHIP MUSIC AND WORSHIP ME YOUR SAVIOUR AND YOUR GOD. AND SO I DID....

I LISTEN TO PANDORA RADIO STATION WHICH HAS ALL MY CHRISTIAN ARTISTS ON THERE AND WHEN I TURNED IT ON THE SONG THAT PLAYED WAS MY SAVIOUR MY GOD BY AARON SHUST..

LYRICS: I AM NOT SKILLED TO UNDERSTAND
WHAT GOD HAS WILLED, WHAT GOD HAS PLANNED
I ONLY KNOW AT HIS RIGHT HAND
STANDS ONE WHO IS MY SAVIOUR

I TAKE HIM AT HIS WORD AND DEED
CHRIST DIED TO SAVE ME; THIS I READ
AND IN MY HEART I FIND A NEED
OF HIM TO BE MY SAVIOUR

THAT HE WOULD LEAVE HIS PLACE ON HIGH
AND COME FOR A SINFUL MAN TO DIE
YOU COUNT IT STRANGE SO ONCE DID I
BEFORE I KNEW MY SAVIOUR

CHORUS: MY SAVIOUR LOVES, MY SAVIOUR LIVES
MY SAVIOUR'S ALWAYS THERE FOR ME
MY GOD: HE WAS, MY GOD: HE IS
MY GOD IS ALWAYS GONA BE

YES LIVING, DYING LET ME BRING
MY STRENGTH, MY SOLACE FROM THIS SPRING
THAT HE WHO LIVES TO BE MY KING
ONCE DIED TO BE MY SAVIOUR

THAT HE WOULD LEAVE HIS PLACE ON HIGH
AND COME FOR SINFUL MAN TO DIE
YOU COUNT IT STRANGE SO ONCE DID I
BEFORE I KNEW MY SAVIOUR

CHORUS:

This song just amazed me so much and just strike me deep in my heart and made me understand even more the price Jesus paid by dying on that cross and his gift was ultimate and beautiful. Yet there i was full in tears still knowing what happened in the past and not realizing that i can just take it to Jesus and that He is there during our hurts and our excitement and our joys and our fears. The answer to the title of this blog is yes because i had like an hour worshipping Jesus in my own room and no one made me its just the voice of Jesus telling me to do something and me doing and obeying my King and Saviour and my God. the next songs reminded me of the most simple truths. Songs like Sanctified by MercyMe, Watch Over me by Aaron Shust, Fragile Breath by Todd Agnew, Kindness by Christ Tomlin and Restored by jeremy Camp. It was probably one of the most amazing days of my life where through obeying Jesus Christ i had a breakthrough and all that pain just left me and i had a peaceful night and at the end of it all i can do i just worship God even more. And i cant stop and i wont stop.

Is There a Normal?????

In America we always use the phrase "Oh i just want to be normal" but as i was thinking about it i realized there isnt really a normal. I mean how do we define normal and what is normal. I think that normal is a lie and nothing more. I looked what the definition of normal is in the dictionary and this what it said: "conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural."

but the thing is i dont think that there is a common type because no one on this earth is common because they are different in their own ways . So i dont believe in normal at all because normal is a lie. People are different in so many things. If a person likes to play sports a lot and someone tells them that they are not normal because they play music a lot is that really true. I dont think so because both are good things and that situation kinda eliminates the idea of being normal. I just dont think there is such a thing because i think its a word that we have in our launguage but its really not true and i think that we shouldnt have that word in the dictionary at all. I believe that everyone is different in their own way and that we all are a little bit crazy and weird in our own way. But that is not something to be ashamed of at all. I think that its good to be different creates an amazing diversity.

My last thought: THERE IS NO NORMAL!!!!!!

Time At Houston

Usually words tell a story but for me pictures tell it better because there is no way i can describe how cute these kids are...

Sarah and charlotte down the slide....

The last couple days i had the chance to have a lot of fun with these kids whether it was going down slides or just having fun by playing. Kids are a lot of fun and that is a fact....

What is My Purpose In Life???

The biggest question of life is what is my purpose for being here on earth!! One that probably many cant answer for me. One that i look for everyday. How do you find the answer to something like this??? The answer is simple trust Jesus! Trust Jesus that He knows your purpose in this life. Be guided by Jesus as he shows you the path that is only meant for you.... Each of us has a different path that God designs for us and its the way things are. Even if you wana change that you cant because you will be just fighting yourself.

We should not fight when we as humans who are sinful try to say to God that we are right and God is wrong because its just doesnt work that way. From experience of my own it doesnt work to fight God because you will just feel so frustrated afterwards and its not worth it at all.

Dont try to figure out what your purpose in life is just follow God and at the right time he will reveal the purpose of your life.

What If Monday June 30, 2008 and Tuesday July 1, 2008

If you had a child and he makes a wonderful noise would you want to share it??? Well this child is not my child but when he was making the noise that a car would make vroom, vroom i just recorded it because it made me smile that out of a small little toy he can still have the time to have some fun. I love seeing kids grow even though most the kids i watch are not my own but still its fun to see that. Take a look at this video that just made me smile....

Monday was a regular day where nothing bizar happened but still during that day i captured Nathan making the car sound... Made me happy that Nathan was happy. Time goes by fast. The same things were going on Tuesday. Both days were beautiful where i watched kids play and watched them grow. I hanged out with Jake and Hannah and that was fun to. I remember my stay in Indiana even though my journey here is almost up. I also remember the gift God gave me to care about little ones and have the patience to comfort them when they are crying.

Sunday June 29, 2008

Some things never change like when to wake up, like having different meals during the day or playing with kids. All are good things to do. But some of those things can be really boring to read about so im going to write about the very interesting things about the day like what happened during the day that was funny or interesting or just very buzzar or a story that was just good to tell. My cousin Laurel once said that if something funny happens we usually write it down kinda like a family tradition. Making sure its in context with whats happening in the day.


This is the story of sunday morning. Sunday morning is the day we worship Jesus although i have to say it would be great if it was every day but Sunday is dedicated where we worship Jesus with other believers and its amazing beyond any comparison to worship Jesus with others. Can't get any others any than that can it. This sunday worship was different.....And it all begins with a car ride. Where we needed to fit 5 people in the car plus two big instruments. The harp itself is even bigger than me

so we had to put the harp and the cello in the car along with two kids, me and Hannah and Jake. How do you fit all that in the car????? Well we put the instruments in the back seat and put Nathan in the back seat without his car seat. Then Jake was driving the car. Hannah sat in the middle while i sat in the passenger seat while holding Paul in my arms once again no car seat or anything but we werent going that far so i guess it was okay. A little adventure on the way to church. We began by singing the hallelujah chrorus.

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! :
For the Lord God Omnipotent reigneth.

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
For the Lord God omnipotent reigneth.

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
The kingdom of this world

Is become the kingdom of our Lord,

And of His Christ, and of His Christ;

And He shall reign for ever and ever,

For ever and ever, forever and ever,
King of kings, and Lord of lords,

King of kings, and Lord of lords,

And Lord of lords,

And He shall reign,

And He shall reign forever and ever,

King of kings, forever and ever,

And Lord of lords,

Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
And He shall reign forever and ever,

King of kings! and Lord of lords!

And He shall reign forever and ever,

King of kings! and Lord of lords!

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

It was beautiful! And i wish i could have recorded a part of the congregation but holding a baby who was sleeping makes it really hard! What was interesting is that Jake and Hannah played the Blackbird which is a song by the Beatles but it was beautiful any way. I love when Jake and Hannah play together its just so beautiful. I would have recorded it again but I had to hold Nathan when Hannah and Jake went on stage to play because other wise he would have went up there any way. I took him outside for a little bit.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your lifeYou were only waiting for this moment to arise

Black bird singing in the dead of night

Take these sunken eyes and learn to see

all your life

you were only waiting for this moment to be free

Blackbird fly, Blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird fly, Blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to arise,oh

You were only waiting for this moment to arise, oh

You were only waiting for this moment to arise

I got a chance to record Jake and Hannah practise although the lighting may say is very poor. It was a happy but a great church servise. Thats the story that was exciting and amazing in its own way everything else was the way it should be playing and all that.

Writing A Day Behind For In My Story Its Day Six Saturday June 28, 2008

In one day there can be stories or something that happened that doesn't usually happen a lot. Stories are meant to be told by someone but they don't need to be published in like a book. Stories happen everyday and i am writing mine. There is the usual thing where one wakes up at a certain time and plays with kids but then a story happens a story of how Hannah, little ones and i went to shop at Kohl's. When one takes a shopping trip to a place whether its the grocery store or just a clothing store means that one needs something that they either forgot or need more of. This story or this trip takes place at eleven o'clock an hour before lunch. Hannah decides that we could go there and come back in an hour. So we put the kids in their seats get in the car and drive to Kohl's which wasn't that far away which is good. On the way there she said don't let me forget to get milk. I said ok. So we get to the store and we have two kids so we decide that both of us should push a cart. So Hannah pushes the baby while i push Nathan in this really squeaky cart so every time i turned it would make this horrible sound. After Hannah found what she needed she needed to try them on so that they fit right but one problem we had two kids so what do we do. Well, this is the master plan while Hannah tried the clothes on i pushed the kids around but first i pushed Nathan around and we went to look at clothes not really buy just look and every time he saw a piece of clothing with a ball on them he would just say really loud "Ball" and i just say yep that's right. Then Hannah took Nathan with her while i pushed Paul around who was making a lot of noise but he was still happy. On the way back i told Hannah don't we need milk. She said yeah we do but i will get it later....


After we got back from a little adventure at the store we went to lunch and after lunch as always the little ones took a nap. And of course i did the usual which is email.. Ta da! Then before dinner i played with the kiddos which is a lot of fun even though a lot of friends of mine will ask me well how is that fun? or don't you get tired of them? But the truth is that i don't and i NEVER will. Then we went to dinner and after dinner i played with them again.


After dinner Hannah takes Nathan to see the orchestra while i stay with Paul and play with him. Paul did some tummy time. take a look.....



When Hannah came back with Nathan she told me that Nathan was being too loud at the concert... That every time the symbols crashed he would say "Woooow" but i thought that was cute. Hannah needed to nurse Paul so i took Nathan downstairs into the lobby and played with him there. The kiddos went night night. Well couple hours later i did too. Yep i did.

Days Go On And Time Passes By But There Is Still More Fun (Day 5, Friday June 27,2008)

I woke up around 8:30 a.m. Journaled because i haven't been able to do that because i was watching kids a lot which is a lot of FUN and i love watching them. Then i played with Nathan! I let him draw in my sketch book, hence the picture. Then he realized that the pen had this clicky thing that he could click in and out. So i guess that was an adventure for him. Then Nathan decided that he also wanted to play some music which was just too cute. I took some pictures of that but better yet i took a video of him playing with Hannah. It was just adorable. Then we went down to lunch... After lunch we went back to
the apartment so that the kids could take a nap and i went downstairs to do email and such. Paul had waken up around 2p.m. and Hannah wanted to practice so i stayed downstairs with Paul and played with Paul till he fell asleep at 3 pm at which point i took him upstairs and put him down in his crib.

Then i went back downstairs to finish blogging about my stay here.... After Nathan woke up Hannah brought both kids downstairs and we all played and had a lot of fun. Then we went to dinner at 5:30 p.m. After dinner we went back to the apartment and played till it was time for Nathan to take a bath and read some books before going to bed. Paul was having a hard time of going to sleep so i stayed with him and Hannah went to see the orchestra. Paul fell asleep an hour later 9:30p.m. to be exact. It was better than it was last night. Then i watched some Matrix Reloaded on the computer. When Hannah came back from the concert she and i just talked till Jake came back. Then we went to bed. Yay!

Some Fun (Day 4, Thursday, June 26, 2008)

I woke up around 8 a.m. as Paul was crying and only wanted to be held and nothing more. I stayed with the baby as Hannah went to breakfast with Nathan. Paul fell asleep as soon as there was quiet in the room on me again... He is just so cute how he falls asleep on me. Jake told me that Paul doesn't do that for him. In the morning i saw a ballet class which was amazing... and while watching these amazing dancers Paul fell asleep on me. This was around 11 o'clock in the morning. Then we walked back to the apartment and stayed there till lunch time. After lunch kids needed to take a nap. But Paul fell asleep during lunch so as were walking back to the apartment all of the sudden there was a lot of wind, the kind of wind that comes before a rain storm so the wind woke him up. After Nathan was in bed Hannah asked me if i could play with Paul since she needed to take a nap because the night before Paul was up a lot so she was very tired. I took Paul downstairs and walked around till he fell asleep then brought him back upstairs to our room and laid him in his crib because he will sleep longer if he is in his crib. Then i went back downstairs to do some email and facebook and of course blog my time here so far. After Nathan woke up i was entertaining him because Hannah needed to practice her harp...




Then we went to dinner. After dinner i took Nathan down to the park where he discovered some big puddles and splashed. He got soaking wet that i took him back to the apartment and gave him a bath....Then we just played inside. At 8p.m. i went down to see some amazing musicians play some of the most beautiful music. then i came back to the apartment so that Hannah could hear it too. Put Paul to bed which was crazy because he kept crying and i didnt know what to do but finally he fell asleep. Then i went to bed because Paul just exhausted me..... But all is well.

Just A Lot More Fun With The Muzzy's (Day 3, Wednesday June 25, 2008)

Woke up at 8:30 a.m. Kids were still asleep so i stayed in the room because Hannah needed to eat because she needed to nurse Paul and I am not that big of a breakfast eater at all so i stayed. Nathan woke up first. So i am just sitting in the room reading my Bible when i hear a little voice saying "Mama". And then i heard it again so i went in the room and i saw Nathan up and ready to go so i open the door to his room and he looks at me really confused but after a few minutes he decided that he didn't want to be in his pack and play so i get him out and we play a little bit till his mom comes back. Paul woke up 10 minutes after Hannah returned. Then lunch is noon and after lunch we have quiet time and the little ones take a nap. After quiet time which is 45 minutes Hannah took me down to Gordon Hall on campus to see some drama stuff which was so cool. The person there did this story of David and Goliath and he was the shield carrier and it was the story about what happens to the shield carrier. It was very humorous. Learned a little about why we laugh. He said that we laugh sometimes of nervousness or the emotions people do. and i really didnt know and then he said that when we laugh at ourselves we are actually laughing at our humility which i thought was interesting. After i left i went back to the little apartment and took a nap for 2 hours. Then we went down to dinner. After dinner there is Bible study so i stayed with the kids as Paul fell asleep so i played with Nathan. He loves to jump so i put him into one of these jumpers. You will see what i am talking about in a minute. Take a look..

This jumper that you put kids in you can hang from the doorway and let the kid jump his heart out. Here he saw my camera as i was taking pictures of him and really wanted it. Cute huh?

Then Paul woke up so the three of us played till Paul got very upset because he got hungry.

Nathan wanted to put Paul's shoes on for him. Isn't that nice.

Paul looking up

Since Nathan had so much energy we decided to walk into town so that Nathan would go to bed easier. After we came back to the apartment and Nathan was put to bed, Jake and Hannah practiced their piece. Paul was still up so i took Paul and walked with him around so that he could go to bed.



Then Hannah, Jake and I looked at each other's pictures and that was a lot of fun. Well that's only day three so now its good night till tomorrow as i find out what the Lord has in store for me for the next day.

Meeting of the Cute Kids (Day 2, Tuesday June 24, 2008)

I reach Elkhart, Indiana at 8 in the morning so an hour late not that bad. Hannah was already there waiting for me with her two kids Nathan who is 20 months...

and Paul who is 4 months.

After I put my bags in Hannah's car and the kids were strapped in we began our ride back to Grace College where the festival was being held. The ride was really loud but i enjoyed it. Paul was crying just because it was his nap time. And Nathan was just talking really loud because he kept seeing trucks on the road and he really likes that. The campus is really beautiful its like Gordon College which is small but really beautiful. We got to Grace College around 11 o'clock by which time Paul was fast asleep. Lunch was at noon till one. I got settled a little bit and then we were off to lunch. Basically the dining hall is like a cafeteria where you can choose what to eat. There were different bars like salad bar, and hot food bar, and desert area and drinks area... After lunch there is quiet time during which the little ones took a nap and so did I. Hannah had to wake me up because dinner was at 5:30p.m. to 6:30p.m. After dinner there was a Bible study and as we were walking to a place where we were gona meet, Paul fell asleep on me which was so cute and i really love that when little ones do that. Than Nathan was being too loud during the Bible study so Hannah asked me to take Nathan to the playground and i did. Before we went to the playground i let Nathan run around a little bit to get some of that energy out. Take a look....But after he ran around a bit i took him to the playground where he just loved the slide.




Then the kids went to bed and Hannah went to a meeting downstairs for parents with kids and i stayed in our little apartment and be there in case the kids woke up and started to cry. When Hannah came back she was practicing her harp which was so beautiful. Then we went to bed. Goodnight...

The Moment I have Been Waiting For (Day 1, Monday, June 23, 2008)

The moment i have been waiting for is an adventure to someplace or somewhere. My adventure starts on Monday june 23, 2008. Although that is when my adventure started you have to understand that im writing 2 days later as the internet in Indiana wasn't working that well. So here we are.... My mom and i left the house around 2 in the afternoon to go to Philadelphia so that i could catch a bus at 3:55p.m. so let just say 4. My adventures usually include an airplane ticket and be there in a couple of hours but not this time. This time im traveling on the bus overnight. After the bus leaves Philly it goes to King of Prussia and then we stop at Blue Mountain rest stop before we get into Pittsburgh at approximately midnight.

I had to transfer buses in Pittsburgh so i had to get off the bus, make sure to get my suitcase which was full of clothes and get in the right line to wait for the bus. The wait was an hour long!!!!!!! I am not a big fan of waiting for that long. we get on the bus at 1 am or so and are on the way to Cleveland, Ohio. When we get in to Ohio they make us get off the bus so that we could reboard and it was 3 am in the morning. Oh my Oh my... Who does that???? I was very groggy and sleepy and got in line to wait to reboard for an hour. I have to say that it wasn't fun at all. Then they board us at 4 am in the morning and and for the rest of the time i try to get some sleep which is very uncomfortable if you are trying to sleep upward..... Quite an adventure but im sure there is more to come. Stay tuned..

God's Amazing Work

Some things in my life dont make sense to me at all. For example why did God let bad things happen to me? And i know that i wont know that answer and better yet maybe i dont need to know like it wasnt in God's plan at all. The thing is that i do relate to Joseph story but in the end he told his brothers "you have done it for evil but God intended for good." I think its the same with me. My biological father might have abused me and hurt me both physically and emotionally but God is gonna use that for good. I know that much. Sometimes it takes awhile for the truth to make sense to me because all my life pretty much i have been lied to and fed lies so literally i started to believe them. But God is breaking through that and that just amazes me to see the power of God in me as He is breaking through the enemy's lies. The way God works through one person is very suprising that you dont know its happening until you see something different. That is just amazes me though. God doesnt ask anyones permission he just works until he is satisfied with his work.

I have seen God do some amazing work in me by putting people in my life that help me through some though things in life like Heather, Aimee and Alana. But i also have seen God work in my brother and a friend who say that they dont believe in God but God uses that still and works on their hearts and they begin to see the truth. I will update on this more as the days go on because i just started to notice that. Now i can say OUR GOD IS A GOD WHO SAVES! YES!

I need JESUS

I think that some mistakes are made without even knowing that they are wrong. I have been taught lots of lies that are mistakes by my biological parents. And it seems that time is against me. There is still time to change. I see my life messed up but what gets me is that Jesus doesnt see my life as messed up. Not only that Jesus loves me more than anything and that gives me some hope. Hope that there is still hope left in the life that i live. Often for me hope is not easy to find. I want my life to be different. I thought i can handle everything on my own but the thing is that i cant. That is the truth. What i am looking for is the truth. How do i find this truth???????? Can you find the truth on your own????? Probably not because if you dont know what the truth is how do you know what you are looking for......

I thought life was a simple thing before it got shattered. What it is now is a shattered life that seems to be broken that i cannot fix. It seems that it is broken forever but the truth is that through Jesus Christ life can be transformed into something different. something that people cant separate. I love Jesus more than anything in this world, but my relationship with Jesus is broken because of my life that was shattered. But here i am trying to get close to someone with my past life that is a terrible thing to write or even think about. I am fighting for something real for the first time in my life at least for something that makes sense now. Without Jesus i have nothing and i feel empty. Over the year i have developed this thirst for Jesus and everytime i choose not to listen to the voice of truth i feel empty and sad because of the emptiness in me.

I wish i could forget the past but the thing is i can get healing from it. The only place i can find peace is in Jesus Christ alone. I know in the end that everything is going to be alright......

The Hardest Thing

I am going to have to tell you the truth about some things. Writing have been my passion. The passion to write the truth. That is my passion. Truth is my passion. I really dont like to lie about life or anything. I am not saying that i dont lie because occasionally i do but a lot of the time i dont. Life has been hard for me and im not going to lie about it. I have been through some rough things that i would rather push down and hide then let other people who love me know them because it is a fear of finding out the things that i dont want them to.

I believe that this year it is time to get out of my comfort zone and start to heal from my wounds from the past. It is not gonna be easy and no one said it will be. People tell me that other people are taking the journey with me and that they love me so i am going to say that it is very encouraging. I think i can move on with this life. Go on to something better. Go on from the hurting. I am scared. Maybe i will always be but at least i can put an effort forward to move on to something better.

For to long i have pushed this pain. Too long i have endured and yet i have a feeling that i might want to hold onto it because that is what i know to be the truth which in the end came out to be lies. I want to find what is true. I want to know the truth. the truth which is found in the Bible. I cant tell what is true or not from what i have been told but I want to know the truth now. What if all i know and have been told by my biological parents is lies???? what if there is no truth in what they told me??????? Now there is a difference coming and i can feel it. I have people pointing me toward truth and for me that is amazing.

Lastly, I want to say that the truth is what i live for and nothing else. Truth i get from the Bible. Truth that points me toward Jesus. Therefore, I will follow Jesus for he has all the answers and all of the truths.

Jesus is Working In My Life

Do you ever feel down but dont know why??? Or even explain why???? I had this feeling couple days ago. Where nothing seemed right. where i felt bad about the smallest things. where i couldnt explain why i cant think clearly. where i wasnt even concentrating on anything. And you know the truth is that in the moment i forget what my life is all about. that i have a person who can conquer this feeling that often comes up in my life. His name is Jesus. Jesus does miracles no one expects. He does them when you dont even ask for it. Most importantly if you ever have this feeling go to Jesus above anything else because He is the one who can satisfy. A friend pointed me in that direction because i was feeling down. Jesus is the way to go. Jesus is there when no one else seemed to care. Jesus is a healer. Jesus will save.

Life is a Story

I was reading a book by John Eldredge called the Epic. It tells us that a life is a story. A story has three parts: 1. who we are

2. why we are here

3. what we are to do

This is what i only read but i know its true because i believe that our life is a story but i also know that the author of this story is good. the fact though is that there is a story we cant escape but also it is written on the human heart. And it is true..........

This is what i learned and actually i learn everyday, new things or old things learning is the same.

SOMETHING WAITING IN THE FUTURE FOR US TO DISCOVER!!!!!!!!

but only we can discover it on our own and nobody can do it for us so there is one thing we can do to discover what is waiting for us there and that is to take a journey that Jesus takes us on.

James 3:17-18, 4:6,7,8; 5:13,15,16,19,20

"but the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness."

I have to say that this verse made me think a lot. You just dont understand it at the first time you come across it and since it was the first time i have read it i was glad i did. Made me think about a lot of the time when people think they are wise but then use it for their own instead of what James says. I actually never thought about the wisdom from heaven although quite a few times asked myself what does wisdom looks like from heaven and now i dont even have to think about because it is stated here in the bible the word of God. This verse gave me this hope that you find nowhere else.

"But he gives us more grace. that is why Scripture says: God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. Submit yourself, then, to God. Resist the and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double- minded."

anytime your in trouble with this is what you have to do which is resist. and just like that it works. I know this from just experiencing different situations in my life when it comes dealing with my past. has put this hold on my past and oppresses me with it all the time but all i do is submit myself to Jesus and flees. This is the power of God.

"Is anyone of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyoe happy? Let him sing songs of praise. and the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a rihteous man is powerful and effective. My brothers if one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring him back remember this:Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from and cover over a multitude of sins."

Hillton Head South Carolina

So we are back to the place where we went last year with family and that is to Hillton Head. And although i miss suz and othniel and their kids and dorothy and sam and arden i have to admit it was still fun although im still here. cheley and shamgar came up for 3 days and their youngest kid Phoenius (hopefully i spelled it right) loved one word "no". so one day i was watching him and asking him what he wanted to do. so i said do you want to walk, do you want to play, do you want to run, and to all my questions he said "no" he said, so i asked him what he wanted to do and all he said was kiss and that is what he got. fun huh.....